Concert in North Park

The concert is over and done with; a HUGE weight has been lifted off of my shoulders. We had a small but incredibly appreciative crowd and I felt like the pieces went really well throughout the evening.

The photos were taken during rehearsals by Manuel Rotenberg. He came by to take shots as we were teching in the afternoon. I'm pleased with the photos. We had another photography during the concert; I'll post those when he develops them.

We opened the show with my solo called "What's In Store," a little political rant wherein, dressed as a janitor, I wadded up newspaper photos of various people who've done idiotic things in the course of history. It was a great release and great fun to put the piece together.

The second piece was my duet, "They'll Devour Me Too." My dancers, Kim Jensen and Molly Terbovich, did a beautiful job. They're in sweat pants in rehearsal, but are in little black shorts in their actual costume.

The last piece was a duet between myself and Dominica Savant-Bunch, a precocious six-year-old who played myself in the past. I was infinitely proud of how well she did on stage; she's beautiful and fearless and will grow into quite something in the next few years.

The two videos were huge hits as well. People had great things to say. I was a nervous wreck for weeks, but I'm really glad I went out and did it. This is my entire life. I wouldn't know what else to do with it.

Now it's Christmas and I have four days until I fly to the East Coast. I'm relishing every minute.

It's The Day of the Show Y'All!

I think Parker Posey's line in "Waiting for Guffman" always expressed preshow jitters best. Whenever I get to an opening night, it's the first thing I think of.

John and I spent our morning buying some cookie platters at Costco and a cash box at Office Depot, and then had a nice breakfast at Brian's counter. I needed big food this morning so I don't get hungry this afternoon. Costco is a nightmare no matter what kind of stress you've got going on, but I found it particularly heinous this morning. The platters look nice though so I'm happy about that.

We'll leave here with everything in about 45 minutes and then it's the point of no return (though I think I may have hit that quite some time ago). I'm looking forward to my next gigs because they don't involve me being in charge of any kind of marketing. I only have to think about the show. What luxury.

The pictures are of Lucius and Monty expressing their giddy excitement for their mom's concert. They are, quite obviously, my loudest cheering section: )

Publicity

That's John shooting in Budapest. Right now he's resting; he's smashed his thumb something terrible and the bruise is like nothing I've seen before on the palm of one's hand. Just as long as it's calmed down for the show..

Speaking of, calendars of all sorts came out today. I'm listed in Citybeat, North County Times and the Union/Tribune's Night & Day section. My New York friend, Brea Cali, has included me on her blog, and I'm shouting about it on this forum as well.

If you're in San Diego this weekend, come by the Arts & Entertainment Center (3026 University) at 7pm on December 17th (That's Sunday). Tickets are $12 ($10 if you're a student) and I'll be showing off three stage pieces and the two dance videos I've crowed about on this blog. The show should run about 45 minutes and there will be refreshments afterwards. It should be a great evening.

You can call 858-752-7560 to reserve tickets.

The Final Week

The picture is a screen grab from the climax of "Utazo (The Traveler)," my Hungarian dance-for-camera. The show is this Sunday and I am very, very ready for it to be here. Performing is one thing; choreographing is one thing; directing is one thing; but marketing and pushing for ticket sales, sending out press packets, etc, is a very hard, full-time job. I understand why so many small dance companies have trouble staying afloat when they are only one person trying to push their work and put butts in seats.

That being said, I'm finished with all of the pieces, done with costumes and am only looking for a couple of props. I had a rehearsal with my six-year-old today who asked me, "Why do we have to rehearse? Why can't we just DO the piece." I wish it could be so, but we're almost there, and rehearsals have been surprisingly easy-going and enjoyable despite my nerves.

Now people just need to show up and things will be all right. San Diego is a very last-minute city I've found. People don't like to commit to anything, they just show up. While this is fine most of the time - small performances don't sell out, it's nerve-wracking when you don't know if anyone will be at your show or not. I just want the assurance and have to learn to live with a certain amount of uncertainty.

Good news is that a dance company in Richmond, Virginia, Z Mullins Dance, is going to show "Utazo (The Traveler)" at their March concert. I am ecstatic to have my work shown on the East Coast. I'm hoping this might be just the beginning.

Other news...John and I finally became grown-ups together and bought a living room suite for each other for Christmas. It's a nice little set with dark wood arms and straight back, soft beige suede cushions, coffee table, end tables and a matching chair. It's funny what a high a big purchase can put you on. I walked out of the store hopping up and down and talking a mile a minute. The last time I did that was after I bought my laptop.

Christmas has actually been really fun this year. We put up a beautiful little tree and I got my shopping done early. Today I mailed out gifts to my new in-laws and I only have a few cards left to send. John and I were on a Christmas movie/Christmas music kick. We spent a marathon watching tongues on telephone poles, "You'll put your eye out," Cary Grant as an angel, Bishop's wives ice skating, George C. Scott yelling "Bah! Humbug!" and "God bless us every one..." We haven't seen the Grinch yet (the old, wonderful cartoon), or Rudolph or "It's a Wonderful Life..." there are a lot of good holiday films out there. "Elf" was the newest one in which we partook. As much as I don't want to like Will Ferrell in anything, I think he's charming, and Bob Newhart is a wonderful "Papa Elf."

John and I went to see The Roches sing a holiday concert with two friends the other night. These three sisters are incredible a cappella singers, their most famous holiday tune is a three-part arrangement of the Hallelujah Chorus. It's incredible. John came home and ordered their holiday album and it put us on a rash of Christmas songs. My two favorites are "Carol of the Bells" and "Sleigh Ride." John loves "Silver Bells" and "Fairytale of New York" by the Pogues. It's funny: I haven't a religious bone in my body but there's something about Christmas music in December that makes me giddy.

Right now? Watching SVU and sitting in betwen my cat and my husband. I only have two more weeks of these pleasures. I need to soak them up.

Mentioned in the News

Janice Steinberg wrote an interesting review of "One to Echo," the concert I went to last Friday, in the San Diego Union Tribune. Here is the link. The best part, selfishly, is that she mentioned me at the end of the review as a young choreographer who is showing her work in the next couple of weeks. There are a lot of us right now. She also mentioned Collette Harding, who is performing on December 9th, 4x4 (Liam Clancy's pet project at Bluefoot Bar that has various dance artists showing their stuff in a 4foot by 4foot space), and Sadie Weinberg, who is performing the Friday and Saturday of the weekend of my concert.

If you live in the area, you could enjoy a whole holiday month of emerging choreographers. It's nice to be recognized.

The photo? Jillian Chu by Elazar Harel. She's the force behind Bound Contemporary Dance, who curated "One to Echo." The pic was on all of the postcards.

It's All About Who You Know..

Acutally...it's all about who knows you. And so, the publicity push for my concert begins. I've been putting hints in people's heads for some time now, but three days ago I sent out a mass email to 200 people in my acquaintence and yesterday I sent a press release to every newspaper and radio/tv station in town. I even sent a couple of personal emails to critics I know in hopes that they will be interested in coming and maybe writing a little something about what they see.

This is the part I have trouble reconciling with myself. I make work because I want people to see it, but I hate promoting myself. I feel somewhat selfish and overbearing when I encourage people to come to my concerts. It's ridiculous because it's the only way to get an audience, but I want people to come of their own volition, not just because they feel strong-armed.

But I bite the bullet and do it. I should be proud of my work and running around screaming it from the rooftops. In fact, if anyone reading this post is in the San Diego area, or has friends here, they should come see it too. It's December 17th at 7pm in North Park. A place called the Arts & Entertainment Center at 30th and University. I'll be there, John will be there, my three dancers will be there. As for the rest of the audience, it's anyone's guess.

It's a good show. I'm particularly proud of my second video, the one John and I just finished. It's well put together and I think Zach did an incredible job with the music. So much so that I want to hire him again for another video. We should make this a regular family affair.

So that's the show right now. Both videos are done, I'm still tinkering with some changes in "They'll Devour Me Too" but it's basically done, My six-year-old other and I have finished our duet, it's just the massive cleaning we're looking at now, and my solo is mentally understood, it just needs time in a physical space. I'm feeling confident in having a show prepared when I walk in the door on the 17th. Now it's just getting people there. I guess I'm not feeling too terrible about that either.

In other news, I'm almost done with my Christmas shopping. That is to say that my family is done and I have an idea in my head about what I want to do for John. I'm sending out a few cards this year but not nearly as many as other years. I must get working on those but hope to get them done over the weekend.

Leaving for Virginia is coming much quicker than I want it to. I've grown to like living at home (imagine that) and the thought of getting on one more airplane and thrusting myself into an unfamiliar place is a bit nerve-wracking. I've got all of my score materials, however, so at least I'm getting a jump on that.

Life is rushing along and me with it.

Feeling Better Today

This picture is of my neice, Elsa, showing me how well she spins in the living room of my parent's home in Missouri. I've been thinking a lot about my neice and nephew and how far away John and I are from them. The holidays always bring up issues of family and right now I am missing all of these people I love.

I think this bit of homesickness has been part of my problem lately. I've been in a funk, as was demonstrated by my blog entry yesterday. I'm feeling a lot better today. I took a three-mile walk and got a blended mocha at this amazing coffee shop called "Mystic Mocha" in North Park, and dropped off some more postcards and, well, ultimately revved up enough endorphins to keep me out of this funk I've been in for the last week.

I think I'm on the brink right now of a lot of things. The brink of this trip to Hungary, the brink of the holidays, the brink of me leaving for almost five months, always the brink of insanity methinks. It puts me on an edge I don't particularly care for and now I'm trying to figure out how to back up.

There are people moving into the house next door. The moving van has been out front all day and I hear noises like vacuum cleaners and electric drills and tiny shouts and sometimes laughter coming from inside the walls. John and I have discussed buying a house but it's a near impossibility for artists in the land of Southern California. What an exciting time it must be for them, but I imagine, as I would be, they are also stressing about being able to keep their finances in order and their house from falling apart. It's one of those future things that I want and don't want all at the same time.

My three cats have all been really ornery with each other lately. Lucius had a huge, bleeding scratch across his face the other morning and I've been periodically hearing screeches and growls coming from the other two as they swipe at each other an jump on the other from behind. The weather isn't nearly as hot as it was and John and I have been in good spirits with each other (despite my bit of funk) so I'm not exactly sure what's going on with them. I don't recommend three cats. There was nothing John or I could do about it as we love all three of our little quadrupeds dearly and had to force them together when we moved into the same abode, but the work load increases ten-fold when you put three of them together. My cat is particularly difficult. It's too bad he's so sweet and utterly cuddly.

I'm leaving in about half an hour to go rehearse with my six-year-old performer. She has very distinct ideas about this piece the two of us are putting together and the whole process has been a huge lesson in compromise for me. I want her to be in on the creation process but we rarely see eye-to-eye about what the piece is actually about. I thought it was going to be a conversation between me and my younger self, but it's become more of a battle of wills between a type-A of my generation and a type-A of hers. The girl's got a mind like a steel trap and a sharper tounge than I ever had at her age. I admire her spunk, and it's been a huge learning process for me. I'm interested to see what we ultimately come up with.

Life never ceases to amaze me.

Forward . . . In Time

So I'm looking ahead to this upcoming concert. It's funny how things seem so very far away on Thursday, and then a certain Monday rolls around and you can see the avalanche barreling towards you. My calendar doesn't look full but I feel it in my veins, that adrenalin rush around the corner as I start to prepare for December.

Brecht closed this weekend. It was a joyous occasion for all and I was especially joyous to finish up there and walk away for a while. The final performance was sheer perfection after a rough matinee that afternoon. It's so terrific to see a group of teenagers in rare form - they were nervous but cool, wandering off on their own, going over lines, breathing together in a circle before filing downstairs to the theater. Several days ago, on opening night, I introduced them to a theater tradition passed on to me by Mary Rotella. We played the hokey-pokey before stepping onstage. I don't know what it is about that ridiculous song that brings a cast together, but it works every time. We picked four body parts before each show. Everyone's favorite (especially if you're 15) is hips. Most memorable was the afternoon performance when the dressing room was moved into the smallest room in creation and we stood outside in the hallway and whispered the song so the approaching audience wouldn't hear it shouted from above.

I received fond gifts from my students. Cards, a gift certificate (!!) and a bottle of wine called "The 7 Deadly Zins" ("very funny...you didn't purchase this yourselves now did you?"), and fought back a little well-up as I watched them slip into the backstage area before we started. I was reminded of my college years performing in an ill-conceived black box, where the performers would enter the stage area from behind the audience AFTER the house lights had gone down. All holding hands, we would be led onto the stage and into the wings by a stage manager with a blue-tinted flashlight. The blue lights backstage always give me a twinge in the stomach...nerves from a bygone era in my life.

So, that's over. I am left with some great pictures, and a downward pointing directional sign that simply says, "Hell," a part of the set from our "Anger" section. Haven't decided where in my house it goes best yet.

The picture is, of course, the back of my postcard. It's a self-portrait, taken at my parent's house a year and a half ago. I'm not ready for the show to go up yet, but John is helping and I think I'll be there in a month. I still have to travel to Hungary, shoot a dance video, finish choreographing a solo piece to Johnny Cash, solidify my piece with a 6-year-old spitfire, and make some changes with my duet. It's a lot, and I am being brought back to my work with Cerulean in Chicago, lo those many years ago, when I ran around town with my friend, Lynne, printing off tickets, sending out press packets, calling newspapers, shoving postcards in people's faces and hoping beyond hope that I got everything done, that I did everything I could to promote.

And so I am promoting here as well. If you're in the San Diego area, come see it!!! The website is linked at the right. I can't verify that you'll like it, but I can verify that I put everything I had into it. It's the only way I know how to work.

Off that subject . . . in other news, election day is tomorrow and I'm still not sure what I want to do about most of these propositions and some of the people I'm supposed to vote for or against. There's too much on the ballot for me to possibly take in properly and I always get into the little cubicle and have a brief moment of "Oh, the hell with it!" before I settle in and take it seriously. I wish I really felt like I made a difference.

It's hot as Hades here and I find myself longing for a real fall and winter. I think I'm truly a Northern girl at heart (as John is a Northern boy). Every time we get Santa Ana winds here I get stopped up and miserable and feel like punching anyone who gets in my way.

John and I have been pricing pet steps to put by our bed so Lucius, my middle aged, somewhat crippled cat, can get up on the bed (and off the bed) without seriously injuring himself. Expensive little buggers those stairs. How can a square of foam cost $140?? I am baffled at how much we spend to make these little quadrupeds happy (while causing myself oodles of sticker shock and stress).

That's all for the moment. More shameless plugs and inconsequential musings later....

And How!

John and I worked all weekend on "Weiblich Ist?" Our little dance film - six minutes long. The image is the logo for our new little production company. I think it will have my voice saying "And How!" like the little girl in the old Shake and Bake commercials. I wish the company actually brought in money to pay for these films, but I guess we can't have everything.

It's great to work on little pieces with my husband. It's unbelievable how quickly he cuts together all of the pieces to make a cohesive whole. We have a montage in the middle of the piece that seemed to fall together by itself, but I know it took his honed skills to make it happen. We make a good team.

Brecht opens on Thursday. Tomorrow is a cue-to-cue, and I worry that we aren't ready. The kids actually had a pretty good run on Friday, but we are still missing some props and some of these changes are still pretty rough, and I know the five in the ensemble are really stressing about their cabaret songs, though they shouldn't. I'm really impressed with how those came together. We have this amazing, mop-headed piano player who talks each of the kids through their music and suddenly they have this instant cohesion with the music.

I didn't really work on anything pertaining to Brecht Project this weekend. I needed a respite. Actually, that's a lie. I went to Nordstrom Rack yesterday to look for the infamous thirties-esque shirts for my two main characters. I think I found something, but it wasn't a picnic. There was a tour group from Arizona shopping there - not to mention that Mission Valley is a heinous place to be on the weekend anyway. Nordstrom's was packed and I stood in line for what seemed like hours, shifting from foot to foot with my arms laden with bad looking shirts in colors I would never dream of wearing, while college kids from Arizona yelled into their cell phones all around me.

Anyway, I laid off the rest of the weekend and John and I spent time at the editing trailer, drinking copious amounts of coffee and laughing a lot. We also ate a late breakfast at Brian's American Eatery (Brian's Big Gay Eatery, as some people call it), watched "Zelig" and "Shadow of a Doubt" last night, and actually read books that didn't pertain to our work. "Zelig" was actually extremely funny. I never realized how well Woody Allen and Mia Farrow fit into the '20's era. Mia Farrow especially; she looked amazing as the demure pschyanalyst. The whole film is pretty genius. Woody Allen slipped himself into real footage from the time period way before "Forrest Gump" came out, and I think he did a much better job of it. There's one moment when he's trying to get Mia's attention from the podium where Hitler is giving a speech that is seamless and hysterical.

I also got started on both stage works for my concert. It was great to see Molly and Kim again, as we struggled through remembering "They'll Devour Me Too." It always amazes me how we can't talk through old choreography, but put the music on and we just start doing the steps. Our muscles have an incredible memory. The hard part will be trying to change some of the choreography and retraining our muscles to understand it. Muscle memory doesn't often like change.

A Job Here...A Job There

This is the iffy black box that I am tyring to present "The Brecht Project" in at Canyon Crest Academy. The kids and I step inside this hole for several hours every afternoon. They work hard, the kids, but putting this show up by myself has not been an easy task. Right now I'm trying to put together costumes. We don't have the money to truly go period, so we are trying to hint at the 30's while pulling things off the rack at AmVets and Salvation Army. The piece has also become a pretty prop heavy show. I didn't start off thinking that it would be, but as these kids keep working and suggesting, I find that every day we are continuously adding things to enhance. My poor A.D., who will unknowingly be in charge of preset, has her work cut out for her.

Yesterday was our last rehearsal without our amazing piano player. He's fifteen or sixteen years old and can pound out anything you ask for. I call the piano man "the heart of the piece" in the script, and he has proved himself to be just that. I'm excited to see what happens as we slowly get the set and costumes together. We open in a week.

I also just finished a video shoot for a little piece called "Weiblich Ist?" I wrote it and John and I shot it and John will edit it. The premise of the piece is a woman who is trying desperately to dress like her true self. She goes from a full ball gown to a full tuxedo and everything in between. Ultimately, she walks out the door in jeans and a t-shirt. KInd of like me.

We shot it in one day. It was a long, long day. I ended up exhausted and needed a day to decompress the next morning, but I think we were all satisfied with what we got. My friend, Cynthia, came along and helped me get dressed and undressed throughout the day. I love sets where we all get along - where we laugh constantly. I think there were only two or three times where there was any tension at all.

The piece premieres on December 17th at my concert, ". . .In Time" at the Arts & Entertainment Center in North Park. I'm shooting a little video in Budapest in a couple of weeks too. The Brecht piece goes up next week at Canyon Crest. These kids are pretty fantastic. I wish all of this work didn't wear me out the way it does.